Get some perspective on hubby’s DIY plan

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This article was published 20/03/2024 (925 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: I love my husband, but he’s a nutcase when it comes to his building projects. He’s like a madman right now with his tools spread all over my antique dining room table on newspapers.

For a whole week he has been cataloguing all his tools and other stuff, in preparation for building some kind of special room on the side of the garage this spring. In his strange mind, he absolutely has to start this project by the end of this month. Why can’t he wait until the nice weather comes and do all this on the lawn?

Tonight, we are once again eating in front of the boob tube on TV tables he bought at a garage sale last summer. This is so unnecessary. We would be a lot happier if he would just listen to reason. Help please.

— Going Nuts, River Heights

Dear Going Nuts: Your husband is listening to reason — his reasoning. For instance, he needed a big flat surface indoors for cataloguing where it isn’t cold. That dining room table looked perfect. It was calling out to him, so what could he do? Plus, he’s in a hurry. In less than two weeks, it will be April, and according to the plan in his head, he can be out in the garage with a heater and you’ll stop nagging him. Why can’t that be so?

Why not give in to the mess of tools and some dinners in front of the TV? While you’re eating, ask your mate to tell you all about his plans to make a special room/porch for the two of you to enjoy this year. If he starts building now, you’ll get to enjoy it most of the summer and in the early days of fall. That’s probably how he sees it — and it’s not such a bad thing, is it?

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: My girlfriend wants sex too much. When she comes over to my place, she wants crazy sex as soon as she gets in the door. It’s probably because I’m the first guy she’s ever had sex with, so she’s really into it.

She still lives with her parents, who seem old-fashioned, so she can’t stay all night with me. Instead, I made the big mistake of giving her my key a month ago to come over when she wants. Now I’m her love toy.

I’m a new teacher and I get home exhausted after a day at school with my students. I need a shower and a rest, and some time to relax without demands to perform from my girlfriend. She’s still in university and the only person she’s responsible to is herself.

Last night I tried to have a talk with her about giving back my key. She took it the wrong way and said, “I thought you loved me.” Then she started crying, so I folded, and let her keep it. I do love her, but I am not her sex machine and I only have so much energy these days. Please help.

— Exhausted Teacher, downtown Winnipeg

Dear Exhausted: On school days when you want to see your girlfriend, start picking her up instead of having her ambush you at your house.

You’ll first need an hour or two at home alone to relax and revive after a day with your students. So, start planning some evening dates with fun things to do. That activity will help you forget the school day and rev you up for better sex, should you decide to go back to your place.

Plus, you both need to start seeing some other friends and relatives again. Even the best-matched couples can get sick of each other if they’re together seven nights a week. It doesn’t mean you don’t love each other, you just need breaks to balance things out.

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6.

Maureen Scurfield
Advice columnist

Maureen Scurfield writes the Miss Lonelyhearts advice column.

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