Mutual fantasy still thrives, so why not?

Advertisement

Advertise with us

DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: My sex buddy from my university days moved to Vancouver years ago and never came back. But then a few weeks ago we ran into each other at a business event in Winnipeg — the reception had an open bar.

Read this article for free:


or

Already have an account? Log in here »

To continue reading, please subscribe:

Subscribe and receive a limited-edition Free Press branded hat or tote.

Digital Subscription

One year of digital access for only $205*

  • Enjoy unlimited reading on winnipegfreepress.com
  • Read the E-Edition, our digital replica newspaper
  • Access News Break, our award-winning app
  • Play interactive puzzles

*First annual payment billed as $205.00 + GST for one year. This annual subscription will automatically renew at $233.00 + GST every 52 weeks (10% off the regular annual price of $259.35). Offer available to new and qualified returning subscribers only. Cancel any time.

To continue reading, please subscribe:

Add Free Press access to your Brandon Sun subscription for only an additional

$1 for the first 4 weeks*

  • Enjoy unlimited reading on winnipegfreepress.com
  • Read the E-Edition, our digital replica newspaper
  • Access News Break, our award-winning app
  • Play interactive puzzles
Start now

*Your next Brandon Sun subscription payment will increase by $1.00 and you will be charged $17.95 plus GST for four weeks. After four weeks, your payment will increase to $24.95 plus GST every four weeks.

Opinion

Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 22/03/2025 (512 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: My sex buddy from my university days moved to Vancouver years ago and never came back. But then a few weeks ago we ran into each other at a business event in Winnipeg — the reception had an open bar.

I heard him way across the room braying like a donkey — no one else laughs like that in this world. I followed his laughter and then I saw him up close, and pointed my fingers at him — like a gun. I squinted my eyes, pulled the imaginary trigger and softly said, “Bam.” He did the same thing right back. (That was our old signal for, “Meet me in the car for some action.”)

He came closer and whispered in my ear, “You serious? I don’t even know what car you’re driving these days.” So, I took him over to a the window and pointed — “That red one.” We met there 15 minutes later after quickly making excuses to leave the reception.

It was naughty fun playing in my car — just a great laugh, like old times. Now he’s gone home and I can’t stop thinking about him. He’s not married and neither am I. It’s not love and I doubt it ever will be, but we are so attracted. Should I ask him to come back for a visit? He says he wants to see me again.

— Can’t Stop Fantasizing, Winnipeg

Dear Fantasizing: Why not have some fun together? You can invite this man to Winnipeg or volunteer to fly to Vancouver and he could have fun hosting you — maybe going to dinners, dancing and then playing the game you love best.

If you do fly out there, get your own hotel so you have an alternative place to be. Who knows what could grow from this fun trip since you’re both free now.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: At 5 a.m. my new girlfriend — a musician — wasn’t home again. No doubt she was “playing” after the gig with one of the band members. That’s how she rolls. I couldn’t stand it anymore — my head was aching and I knew I wanted her out of my life.

So, I got up, threw all her clothes in two moving boxes she used to move into my place three months ago.

I knew I wasn’t going to be able to sleep and was ready to blow sky high, so I called my best friend when the sun came up. He swore loudly, but came right over to help me.

I needed him and his van to help me deliver my girlfriend’s wardrobe, her two cats, three litter boxes and collection of musical instruments to her mother’s house.

Her mom was shocked when she saw us opening the fence and backing up to the deck. When she came out shrieking at us, I yelled back: “Your daughter is moving back home today.”

She asked why and then I lost it. I told her that her daughter has another boyfriend she’s started sleeping with and has not once paid her half of the rent, bills or groceries. Also, she drinks wine all day at home and keeps getting fired from her music gigs.

Her mom started crying and said, “I knew this would happen, and you were so nice, too.”

I told her I was going home to change my locks, and let her know I would phone her daughter to tell her where her stuff was and that she’d living with mommy again.

Her mother dried her tears and stared at me. It was very awkward, so we just left.

I started chasing this girl in the first place because she was sexy, beautiful and a “performer” in every way imaginable. I fell for her, but she was just using me to get out of her mother’s house.

She never helped me cook, clean or do anything. She just sat on her phone.

When I would get mad about anything, she would say, “So spank me, why don’t you, daddy?” I don’t hit women, and I don’t want that kinky kind of relationship. But now what? I know she’ll keep coming over drunk and banging on my door.

She won’t give up because she can’t stand to be left, like her father left her mother. What can I do to get rid of her for good?

— Refuse to Get Used, Westwood

Dear Refuse: You still need one last conversation with this woman, so talk to your ex in a public place — not anywhere she could try to seduce you back into the relationship just so she won’t have to stay with her mom.

Explain that you two are finished for good, and to stop contacting you. Make it clear that she needs to get some counselling help over her dad abandoning her mom and her, but don’t offer to help her with her problems. You don’t owe that to her after how she’s treated you.

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6.

Maureen Scurfield

Maureen Scurfield
Advice columnist

Maureen Scurfield writes the Miss Lonelyhearts advice column.

Our newsroom depends on a growing audience of readers to power our journalism. If you are not a paid reader, please consider becoming a subscriber.

Our newsroom depends on its audience of readers to power our journalism. Thank you for your support.

Report Error Submit a Tip

More Stories

City MP, nurses want safety standards for increasingly violent health facilities

Jessica Botelho-Urbanski 6 minute read Preview

City MP, nurses want safety standards for increasingly violent health facilities

Jessica Botelho-Urbanski 6 minute read Friday, Mar. 1, 2019

While there have been hundreds of violent incidents reported at two Winnipeg hospitals over two years, there haven’t been provincial or national safety standards established for health-care facilities, something one local union and a Winnipeg MP are pushing for.

From October 2016 to October 2018, there were 444 violent incidents reported at the Health Sciences Centre and 175 such cases at Grace Hospital, according to freedom of information results obtained by the Free Press.

The statistics encompass incidents of verbal abuse and threats of violence, plus instances of physical aggression. Some incidents stem from deliberate acts, while others involve patients with dementia or those disoriented from a medical condition, who may have no control over their actions.

A Winnipeg MP who spent years working as an emergency room physician is trying to draw attention to health-care violence nationally, tabling a petition Friday that asks Ottawa to tackle an issue in which he has first-hand experience.

Read
Friday, Mar. 1, 2019

West Kildonan Industrial residents call for speed bumps after child hit by truck

Morgan Modjeski 3 minute read Preview

West Kildonan Industrial residents call for speed bumps after child hit by truck

Morgan Modjeski 3 minute read Updated: Yesterday at 3:09 PM CDT

Residents in the West Kildonan Industrial neighbourhood are calling on the city to install speed bumps in their area after a child was hit and dragged by a vehicle Thursday.

Katelyn Bemister lives near the area where the child — who was hospitalized as a result of the incident and has been upgraded to stable condition — was struck. She says people frequently speed in the area.

“They’re going really fast, and they’re not really paying attention at all to the pedestrians in the area,” says Bemister.

In video supplied to the Free Press by a resident, the child can be seen riding a bike down a sidewalk along the 500 block of North Point Boulevard.

Read
Updated: Yesterday at 3:09 PM CDT

HSC weapons scanners effective, needed at other hospitals: nurses union

Carol Sanders 5 minute read Preview

HSC weapons scanners effective, needed at other hospitals: nurses union

Carol Sanders 5 minute read Yesterday at 9:57 AM CDT

The AI weapons scanners at Health Sciences Centre have detected close to 2,000 items since they were installed at Manitoba’s largest hospital.

From March 6, 2025 to the beginning of this month, a total of 1,973 items had been flagged by the scanners and identified for further review, Shared Health said this week.

Knives, Swiss army knives and other multi-tools, drugs, alcohol, box cutters, syringes and other injection devices were detected, it said. The technology set up at entrances to the adult and children’s emergency rooms and the crisis response centre is designed to identify a wide range of objects that may require review under site safety protocols.

But Manitoba Nurses Union president Darlene Jackson said the technology isn’t available everywhere at HSC, and a sawed-off rifle was discovered in the adult ER earlier this month.

Read
Yesterday at 9:57 AM CDT

For Harris, memories of mother guide bid for vice-president

Matt Sedensky, The Associated Press 13 minute read Preview

For Harris, memories of mother guide bid for vice-president

Matt Sedensky, The Associated Press 13 minute read Friday, Aug. 14, 2020

NEW YORK - Speaking from the Senate floor for the first time, Kamala Harris expressed gratitude for a woman on whose shoulders she said she stood. In her autobiography, Harris interspersed the well-worn details of her resume with an extended ode to the one she calls “the reason for everything.” And taking the stage to announce her presidential candidacy , she framed it as a race grounded in the compassion and values of the person she credits for her fighting spirit.

Though more than a decade has passed since Shyamala Gopalan died, she remains a force in her daughter’s life as she takes a historic spot on the Democratic ticket besides former Vice-President Joe Biden. Those who know the California senator expect her campaign for the vice presidency to bring repeated mentions of the woman she calls her single greatest influence.

“She’s always told the same story,” said friend Mimi Silbert. “Kamala had one important role model, and it was her mother.”

___

Read
Friday, Aug. 14, 2020

Report slams Omnitrax in fatal derailment

Kevin Rollason 4 minute read Preview

Report slams Omnitrax in fatal derailment

Kevin Rollason 4 minute read Thursday, Apr. 23, 2020

A Hudson Bay Railway derailment south of Thompson which resulted in the death of a conductor occurred after the track was washed out because of high water levels due to heavy rain.

But the 44-page report released by the Transportation Safety Board of Canada on Thursday also condemned the railroad's former owner, Omnitrax, saying that in the months before the derailment, while the company still owned it, "because the rail line was for sale, much of the other infrastructure maintenance was being deferred.

"In general, HBR, under Omnitrax, performed only a minimum amount of maintenance to keep the remaining portion of the rail line open while remaining in regulatory compliance. With a reduced engineering force, the track infrastructure began to deteriorate."

The TSB also found Omnitrax's reduction of its beaver control program also left the track vulnerable to a washout, its emergency response plan didn't include anything about responding to a train derailment, and the plan had never been reviewed by the regulator.

Read
Thursday, Apr. 23, 2020

Damian Warner, the world’s greatest athlete with a pretty good back story, is the right choice to carry the Canadian flag at Tokyo’s closing ceremony

Bruce Arthur - Columnist, Toronto Star 6 minute read Preview

Damian Warner, the world’s greatest athlete with a pretty good back story, is the right choice to carry the Canadian flag at Tokyo’s closing ceremony

Bruce Arthur - Columnist, Toronto Star 6 minute read Sunday, Aug. 8, 2021

“It is the honour of a lifetime,” the decathlon champions says. “And I understand that this honour could have went to anybody on this team.”

Read
Sunday, Aug. 8, 2021