Steer clear of ‘pals’ and their shady schemes

Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 12/03/2025 (551 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: Nobody else knew the large amount of money I had saved, except my dad and grandad — until recently!

I’m in university, but I’ve been working part-time since early high school and saving hard for years. My dream is to be able to invest in new inventions and make big money.

Someone I considered a close friend got me super drunk on my recent birthday. I opened my big mouth and told him how I had all this money piled up in the bank.

He started guessing now much, and squeezed a ballpark figure out of me. He found it exciting and started yapping to a couple of our other buddies there.

One “friend” started calling me up a few days later with ideas for starting a business together. I noticed he wasn’t saying how much he’d be putting in, even though I asked him repeatedly until he hung up.

I found out today he’s been down at the bar telling his version of this story to mutual friends, so I guess everybody in our group will soon know how much money I have saved.

This guy can barely pay his own bar tabs, according to my best buddy. I don’t know what to do and this situation is seriously stressing me out. Please help!

— Should Have Kept Quiet, Fort Garry

Dear Should Have: It’s time to sort your real friends from the ones who just want to “help” you invest your dough. But first, tell your dad and grandad what happened recently and how it’s made you feel pain, embarrassment and insecurity. They will have experience to share on how to spot users quickly and shut them down.

Unfortunately, there are lots of people who want to cosy up to folks with money in the bank, with the hopes of benefiting. If these people are not your close, trustworthy friends, don’t keep them around.

Then take all the time you need to get yourself well-educated in investing before you back anybody’s projects. Get involved with people who have a track record of responsibly backing a series of successful projects, not just one venture they keep boasting about.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I have a beautiful new girlfriend who dislikes my awesome cats. She’s smart and beautiful, but I find her to be a bit bossy. Lately she claims she’s allergic to my animals — without any physical signs whatsoever.

I know she hates my cats — and they fear and dislike her. Part of me thinks they can sense she’s trying to get rid of them. They’re not wrong.

They usually sleep at the foot of my king bed with me, except when my girlfriend is over for the night. She always wants my cats locked down in the basement which is cold, lonely and dark.

I did it a few times for her sake, and my cats cried and cried to get out. It was freezing cold down there.

A few nights ago she came over (she never calls first) and made it clear she wanted to stay overnight.

Her method is to go into the shower, and I have to wait outside and then tell her how beautiful she is when she comes out. Then she tells me she’s giving me the “supreme gift” of her body, like she’s some movie star or goddess.

When she was done showering the other night, she yelled from the bathroom that I had to “throw the cats down in the basement.”

I started to feel myself getting really mad. One of my cats is very old and not that well, and I don’t think she should be put in the basement.

Then my girlfriend asked when I was getting rid of that old cat “because she’s on her last legs anyway!” I lost my temper then. I told her I was never going to do that, and I was sick of the way she acts, told her to get out of my house.

She has since told friends of mine I have a “weird” relationship with my animals. She is trying to make me sound creepy, and I’m not. What I should do?

— Animal Lover, West End

Dear Animal Lover: End everything with this cruel and bossy woman for good. You’ll be glad you did.

If she shows up again — and she’s the type who will — don’t answer the door.

You are a kind-hearted and co-operative man by nature, and both you and your furry friends should have gentle and loving people around you.

She is not one of these people.

It’s time to see a psychologist to talk out your relationship with this controlling woman, so you aren’t attracted to another one like her in the future. Ask your medical doctor to recommend some possibilities for the counselling you need.

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6.

Maureen Scurfield
Advice columnist

Maureen Scurfield writes the Miss Lonelyhearts advice column.

   Read full biography