Party passion is no put-on, so get prepped

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This article was published 22/10/2024 (711 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: My girlfriend thinks Halloween is a stupid celebration for an adult in their late 20s, but I love it with a passion. My secret costume for the swanky costume party I always go to is ready to be picked up from the designer who brings my sketches to life every year.

I’ve said nothing to my girlfriend about the annual event this year. Finally, she said today, “If you’re not inviting me to your fancy Halloween party, don’t expect to knock on my door ever again.”

So I laid it out. I told her I’m definitely going alone this year to what I think is the best annual private Halloween party in this city. She told me to drop dead!

I’ll do just the opposite. With no girlfriend along, I’m going to be free to meet new people and connect like never before. This year I’ll be open to the major flirting that takes place at the event. It’s amazing how much braver people are behind a costume and mask, especially when the refreshments are good. However, I have no real experience with this, so please help me out here. at this.

— Flying Solo, West End

Dear Flying Solo: Some of the party attendees will be as daring and creative as you are, so head straight for the people with the most unique and interesting costumes.

Ask them all about their getups, especially if they appear custom-made, as yours always are. With this approach, the conversation could be good right off the bat.

If you know you’d like to see certain people again as friends, ask if they’d like to be on your costume-party list for next Halloween, and give them your contact info. It’s their choice if they want to make further contact.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I love eating out at restaurants, but it costs a fortune, so I try to copy the dishes I like most from these fancy eateries.

The other night, I couldn’t name an unusual spice in a dish, so I asked to say hello to the chef and congratulate him on the dinner he’d cooked.

This tactic usually works, so it wasn’t surprising that the chef came out. I asked him to tell me what was the combination of spices in a certain hot sauce he made for us that night. He suddenly got all prissy and said, “I make it a practice not to give away my secrets.” Then we got into an argument about that stupid practice.

He was acting like such a snob that I didn’t leave any tip on our big bill. I knew the waiter would go back and let the chef know.

The problem is, my wife is furious with me now. She says I was “punishing the wrong person” and I had no right to ask a chef for his secrets. “Now we can’t go back there because of you!” she yelled. She wants me to call and apologize.

I said, “Over my dead body!” Even if I apologized, I don’t think that particular chef or restaurant owner would want me back there. I don’t want to go anyway, so I’m going to let sleeping dogs lie, but my wife keeps insisting.

Finally last night, I told her to write the owner and chef a note herself. She says she will, but what for? I wouldn’t go back there, even if they begged me.

— Super-Annoyed, River Heights

Dear Annoyed: You needn’t worry that you’d be invited to go back to dine there, unless you apologized yourself. Be aware that there’s a chance your wife will get an invitation to come back, with a friend. That’s her choice, and if you’re smart about this, you won’t try to interfere.

Please send your questions to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6.

Maureen Scurfield
Advice columnist

Maureen Scurfield writes the Miss Lonelyhearts advice column.

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