Daddy dig will (hopefully) deter lecherous pig

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This article was published 06/02/2025 (588 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: Well, he’s back again — the biggest male chauvinist pig in our industry. He’s been re-hired, and he’s going to be working next to me. The guy is in his late 40s now, and the weird thing is, he actually can curb his sexist crap — when he wants to.

My question? How can I get him to stop drooling over me? I’m a woman in my early 20s and young enough to be his daughter. I know he wants me sexually. Should I remind him of his age, or maybe just lie and tell him I’m not into men?

— Need Peace, Winnipeg

Dear Need Peace: Never mind the lesbian lie. Here’s a good passion-killing line to use: “You really remind me of my father! You’re his age, you look like him and you act like him, too.”

Do not deliver this as a joke. When the guy asks, “Just how old is your father?” tell him the truth.

If he keeps pushing and asks, “Wouldn’t you like a guy with some experience?” you say, “Not necessarily. I want a boyfriend who’s about my age, and someone I can actually stand being around.”

That’ll give him the message you really don’t care about him, other than working with him — when you are absolutely required to do so.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: My wife is in love with herself, her sports and her built-up body.

I married her thinking I’d be close with her, and we could start a family. I loved her and I love kids, but she has thrown me over for sports.

She’s a long-distance runner and plays racquet sports very seriously. I could maybe admire that in a person, but she’s basically ditched the “making a family with me” idea, for these activities.

Last week she told me she doesn’t want to “put her body through a pregnancy” Right, her precious athletic physique is more important than a baby.

Her peace offering? Rather than carry a child that is part her and part me, she’d agree to adopt one kid. I just choked! How could she even think that? When two people are healthy and love each other, they usually want to create children together.

I demanded to know why she would insist on adopting, and that started world war three, which lasted all evening. This morning, she had more news. She told me she’s not even sure about adoption, as she’s so devoted to her pursuits and teams that she wouldn’t relish having a dependent baby crying for “Mommy” when she wants to go out for a run every day. I told her that her athletic endeavours won’t last forever, to which she said, “Oh yeah? Watch me.” Those words keep echoing in my head.

Do I even want a mother for my children who’s cold like this? I’m so messed up now. If she loved me, wouldn’t she want a child created from both of us?

— Decimated, Fort Richmond

Dear Shocked: If you want a warm marriage and close family where you care for your young ones personally, this may not be the forever wife for you. She’s told you clearly she’s gotten seriously into sports and doesn’t want any pregnancies to get in her way.

You’re different and it seems you need another sort of woman for the long haul. Things can shift in a hurry. In fact, if you weren’t already married to this woman, you might have walked away right after this declaration.

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6.

Maureen Scurfield
Advice columnist

Maureen Scurfield writes the Miss Lonelyhearts advice column.

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