Jealousy no basis for a lasting relationship

Advertisement

Advertise with us

DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: My girlfriend and I just got back together after a colossal fight. I had already returned the little sapphire necklace I bought to give her as a surprise on Valentine’s Day.

Read this article for free:

or

Already have an account? Log in here »

To continue reading, please subscribe:

Subscribe and receive a limited-edition Free Press branded hat or tote.

Digital Subscription

One year of digital access for only $205*

  • Enjoy unlimited reading on winnipegfreepress.com
  • Read the E-Edition, our digital replica newspaper
  • Access News Break, our award-winning app
  • Play interactive puzzles

*First annual payment billed as $205.00 + GST for one year. This annual subscription will automatically renew at $233.00 + GST every 52 weeks (10% off the regular annual price of $259.35). Offer available to new and qualified returning subscribers only. Cancel any time.

To continue reading, please subscribe:

Add Free Press access to your Brandon Sun subscription for only an additional

$1 for the first 4 weeks*

  • Enjoy unlimited reading on winnipegfreepress.com
  • Read the E-Edition, our digital replica newspaper
  • Access News Break, our award-winning app
  • Play interactive puzzles
Start now

*Your next Brandon Sun subscription payment will increase by $1.00 and you will be charged $17.95 plus GST for four weeks. After four weeks, your payment will increase to $24.95 plus GST every four weeks.

Opinion

Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 05/02/2025 (542 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: My girlfriend and I just got back together after a colossal fight. I had already returned the little sapphire necklace I bought to give her as a surprise on Valentine’s Day.

She shocked me by apologizing yesterday — lots of tears and begging. I’m a sucker for tears, so we made up perhaps too soon. I woke up this morning, still riding on waves of discontent and feeling kind of sick to my stomach. I really don’t want to give her any kind of ring this Valentine’s Day. Money is not the issue. I’m a songwriter, but I also have a trade and a full-time day job.

Jealousy is really the problem. I found out my girl’s ex-boyfriend has been circling around like a shark, and telling her close friends he wants another chance. I’d like to stick my fist down his throat! I’m not 100 per cent sure I want to be with this woman forever, but I don’t want that jerk to get her.

— So Mixed Up, Fort Richmond

Dear Mixed Up: Feelings of competition and jealousy are bad reasons to put a ring on anybody’s finger. So, buy your girlfriend a piece of jewelry you know she’ll like, but not a ring. That can come later, if you two totally mend things and the relationship thrives.

This year, show yourself some love around Valentine’s Day. Make an appointment to talk to a relationship counsellor by yourself, about your feelings for this woman — the good, the bad and the ugly. An investment of one or more appointments, could help you figure out how you really feel in your heart, and save you a lot of grief.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: My first husband has come back to the city and has a job with a new branch of his old company. Today I got a call at work from him. I never wanted to share this city with him again.

He has “small man-syndrome” and it was a big deal for him to have a tall model for a girlfriend, like me. I towered over him in my heels and he loved taking me out, dressed to the nines — like I was a big prize he won at a carnival.

He really just used me, and he cheated on me from the beginning.

In the end, I was the one who could have got into legal trouble for losing it on him and beating the little creep with my fists and purse. He deserved it, and he knew it! Luckily, he didn’t want anybody to know how he got the black eye, so he kept quiet.

So now he’s back, and I’m not just going to sit here and take it.

But what can I do?

— Trouble Back in Town, West Kildonan

Dear Trouble: You and your violent hands luckily dodged being charged for assault. Be aware that if you invite another round, this old boyfriend might actually have you charged.

Also, it’s highly likely he has a new girlfriend now, and doesn’t care about what you’re doing anymore. So let this old relationship be gone, and stay gone.

You already know you’re capable of being violent, and you don’t need to put yourself in a position to wind up in jail. It’s time to get professional help and figure out how to find yourself a loving man who’s as big and tough as you are.

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6.

Maureen Scurfield

Maureen Scurfield
Advice columnist

Maureen Scurfield writes the Miss Lonelyhearts advice column.

Our newsroom depends on a growing audience of readers to power our journalism. If you are not a paid reader, please consider becoming a subscriber.

Our newsroom depends on its audience of readers to power our journalism. Thank you for your support.

Report Error Submit a Tip

More Stories

0 minute read

Too close to call in Assiniboia

Marsha McLeod 2 minute read Preview

Too close to call in Assiniboia

Marsha McLeod 2 minute read Tuesday, Oct. 3, 2023

The Winnipeg constituency of Assiniboia was too close to call Tuesday, with the NDP candidate leading over the incumbent Tory minister of seniors and long-term care.

At 11:15 p.m., Elections Manitoba, reporting just seven of 18 polls, had the NDP’s Nellie Kennedy with a 562-vote lead over Progressive Conservative incumbent Scott Johnston in the swing riding on the western edge of the city.

Losing the seat would be a blow for the Tories, but it would be a moral, rather than a functional, one. A win for the PC incumbent would do little to dent the NDP’s majority victory. Liberal Charles Ward was running a distant third.

A NDP win would be a reversal. In the 2016 and 2019 elections, the party lost Assiniboia to the PCs by roughly 16- and nine-point margins, respectively. Johnston won with 44 per cent of the vote in 2019.

Read
Tuesday, Oct. 3, 2023

Confusing rules leave business owners anxious

Temur Durrani 5 minute read Preview

Confusing rules leave business owners anxious

Temur Durrani 5 minute read Tuesday, Feb. 9, 2021

Dino Camiré is counting down the days before the province makes his business a “pandemic scapegoat” again.

He said it happened before when restrictions were loosened last fall, and believes it’ll happen again after updated public-health orders come into effect this Friday.

“It won’t be my fault or any other businesses included in these reopenings,” said the operator of One Family Fitness Centre in Winnipeg. “But what happens when COVID-19 cases start rising again? It’ll be so much easier to blame us, even though we’re the ones stuck following and trying to understand their confusing rules.”

Camiré’s frustrations are among many from business owners in the province, who the Manitoba government is allowing to reopen — but with stringent capacity limits and with regulations they described to the Free Press as vague, confusing and “frankly, offensive.”

Read
Tuesday, Feb. 9, 2021

Excited Goldeyes fans buzz over Manitoba Mosquitoes’ name change

Grace Penner 4 minute read Preview

Excited Goldeyes fans buzz over Manitoba Mosquitoes’ name change

Grace Penner 4 minute read Yesterday at 10:41 PM CDT

BITE club has entered the ball park for a single game, filling the stands with mosquitoes — just not in the way you may think.

The Fish are participating an alternate identity takeover, one that many other teams in the minor baseball leagues have been having some fun with. The Winnipeg Goldeyes re-branded to pay homage to the province’s beloved summer creatures, the Manitoba Mosquitoes.

The Fargo-Moorhead RedHawks had some fun with its alternative identity, doing a five-game name change to the Woodchippers, a fun reference to the 1996 film Fargo.

Other honourable mentions are the Chicago Dogs, who switched over to the Chicago Wieners, the Sioux Fall Canaries transformed into the Minnehaha Martians, Milwaukee Milkmen became the Franklin Benjamins, and the Lake Country Dockhounds swapped to the Wisconsin Dive Bars.

Read
Yesterday at 10:41 PM CDT

Each of city's historic bridges has unique story

Declan Schroeder 11 minute read Preview

Each of city's historic bridges has unique story

Declan Schroeder 11 minute read Sunday, Sep. 6, 2020

They span the muddy waters from which Winnipeg derives its name. They connect neighbourhood to neighbourhood. They’re a fundamental feature of our city.

Winnipeg has a reputation as a “River City,” but many don’t know the stories behind the bridges they use every day.

While a bridge may seem to be a boring piece of basic infrastructure, many of Winnipeg’s have fascinating histories that go back more than 100 years.

 

Read
Sunday, Sep. 6, 2020

Local brother act cut their teeth working with the late Jerry Lewis

Bill Redekop  6 minute read Preview

Local brother act cut their teeth working with the late Jerry Lewis

Bill Redekop  6 minute read Monday, Aug. 21, 2017

One of the toughest tasks for the Steiner Brothers, a former kid tap dancing act from Winnipeg, was performing with Jerry Lewis at hospitals for sick kids.

“Oh my, you’d be trying not to cry,” recalled Rob Steiner, 72.

And Lewis, who would go on to help raise over US$2 billion for muscular dystrophy over his career with his annual telethons, would admonish the boys.

“He’d say, ‘What are you crying for? You’re making them happy. Why are you crying?’”

Read
Monday, Aug. 21, 2017