Don’t expect sympathy for shopping while soused

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This article was published 28/03/2024 (918 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: I got into a bad situation with a store clerk and got kicked out because I was drunk. I banged on the window and phoned from outside to try to explain, but the employees said on the phone, and yelled through the window, that l couldn’t come back in. They said they would call the police.

I went away for 15 minutes, but I was mad and went back to explain, but they had locked the door on me. I was so insulted. I have dropped lots of money in that store before. So what if I had a few beers on a Saturday afternoon? Who doesn’t, from time to time? What the heck was wrong with them?

— Upset Former Customer, St. James

Dear Former Customer: You were noticeably drunk and got the boot because of that. That’s totally fair.

Most people don’t go into a shop obviously drunk and expect to be welcomed. Some inebriated customers are unpredictable — and some are downright scary. They may not be able to put their foot on the brakes when it comes to behaving, making loud and inappropriate comments, handling merchandise and possibly stealing it, to boot.

If they arrive drunk with a sidekick, the visit is perceived as even more of a threat. That‘s why so many stores and shopping malls have security staff — so shopkeepers can quickly get help.

Don’t call that store back thinking there will be an apology coming from them and you will be invited back to shop. They’ll want no more contact. Don’t think you can just slip back slip in unnoticed. They’ll likely have a mugshot of you from security camera footage, so they can recognize you quickly.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: My ex-boyfriend is nothing short of disgusting. He still attends the church I brought him to, but now he goes with my former best friend — a backstabber I introduced him to there.

She used to be my closest girlfriend and I innocently told her about my problems with him. She took that information and pretended to soothe me and try to help me with him, although she was really plotting to get him herself. A few months passed, and something was really wrong between us.

I caught them cheating on me when I came back early from a weekend away at a conference.

How dare they continue go to my church together and sit there holding hands? How can they stand themselves? I’ve cried and cried. The worst thing is, I love my church and that’s where I’ve always found solace when I’m going through troubled times. What should I do?

I want those two gone from there — kicked out, if necessary. I went to that church first and I never double-crossed anybody. It would kill me if they got married there one day, and I wouldn’t put it past them.

Last Sunday, I was so agitated I went home early from church, feeling an anxiety rash breaking out. There is no other church of the same faith for me to go to in my town. Why should I have to go to another town? I would feel so lonely and out of place. Help.

— Robbed of My Church, southern Manitoba

Dear Robbed: Whoa. You don’t have to give up your hometown church. True, you can’t have the offending couple kicked out, but you can lessen your own discomfort with a few moves. First, arrive late — less than five minutes before the service begins — and see where the offending duo is seated.

Then choose a seat close to the front and near the middle where you can get wrapped up in the service and the music, and you won’t have them in your view. They’ll have to look at the back of you every time they go to church and maybe feel guilty — too bad. Let that be their discomfort. At the end of the service, chat with someone near you, and let that annoying couple exit before you do.

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6.

Maureen Scurfield
Advice columnist

Maureen Scurfield writes the Miss Lonelyhearts advice column.

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