DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: I’m a guy who’s always had one eye on the female sex — but a secret eye on guys, too. I am not turned on by my group of regular sports buddies — a great team of “players” in every sense of the word, but I do feel somewhat attracted to classical musicians who play music for the love of it, like I do.

I still have my girlfriend, but suddenly I have another interest — a brand-new guy I’ve started to see a little.

I don’t enjoy juggling the two relationships. It’s not a powerful feeling. I do feel guilty, and that I may hurt somebody badly, but I don’t want to lose either one of them. I actually care for both people. Maybe I’m just oversexed.

My best friend (also secretly bisexual) suggests I should, “Run them both ragged, and find out who can keep up.” Stupid joke, or not bad advice?

What do you suggest? I’m afraid I’ll get nervous and say something revealing and just end up with nobody.

— Nervous Undercover Bi Guy, Downtown

Dear Undercover Bi Guy: The fear you’ll end up with nobody is not a realistic one unless people of any sexual type are afraid to trust you with themselves.

So stop listening to your male bisexual friend and consider getting honest with these partners you’re not telling the whole truth. They both deserve that, and you already know one person is not the whole answer for a man like you.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I have recently become an executive and there are quite a few parties involved.

My wife just announced she wants a new ring to show off at these functions. I said, “Hopefully, it doesn’t have to be real?” but she responded, “It has to be real, or those people will know.”

I can certainly afford to buy her a new ring of that stature, but it hurts that the first one (her engagement ring) doesn’t even rate as party jewelry anymore. Help. How do I talk to her about this?

— Hurt Pride, St. Boniface

Dear Hurt Pride: You might ask your wife if she’s likely to buy you a fancy new ring.

In fact, you might solve this whole problem if you both acquired rings as a kind of renewal of your love. She may look surprised and say, “Do you really want one?”

Be aware there are people who just don’t treasure rings very much at all — and especially don’t like feeling them on their sensitive fingers.

You two really need to talk this over ASAP because there may not be a big problem here at all once you get it out in the open.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: My live-in girlfriend is a masseuse by trade now, but do you think I get touched? Not lately. She’s had so much business she isn’t the least bit interested in touching my body to give me any thrills once she gets home. Last night she rolled on her stomach and said, “Hey. Why don’t you give me a massage? It’s been a long day serving everybody else at work.”

I said, ‘Why not?” In five minutes, I had her asleep and snoring. What does this mean?

— Confused Husband, Osborne Village

Dear Husband: This probably means she was bone-tired, and your familiar touch put her right to sleep. The lesson in this? That old saw, “The shoemaker’s child goes shoeless,” may fit.

So don’t complain about her falling asleep. There must be many times when she’s so physically tired out at work that she feels like collapsing, but things will change for the better as her work life progresses and you’ll surely be on the receiving end of her well-practised touch.

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6.