If creatures don’t feature, she’s just not a keeper

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This article was published 16/01/2025 (555 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: I’m a guy with a big heart and because of that, I’ve taken in many animals to look after. I have a small place out in the country. I don’t want to say how many animals I have because I know it’s probably frowned upon by some.

I’m young and strong and hate seeing a dog, cat or bird suffering without food, companionship or vet care. It just kills me.

I recently started dating a woman I’ve been falling for, but she isn’t really an animal person. She did pretend to be at first, though.

She’s been pushing our relationship forward swiftly and recently said to me after some great sex: “When we move in together, you’re not bringing your animals, right?”

I’m a gentle guy, but I blew sky high. I jumped out of the bed. I told her it was an incredibly selfish thing to say and that there was no plan for us to move in together, anyway. She tried to make a joke of it and said, “Aren’t I enough animal for you?”

Frankly, no.

Her new reaction is to tell me to give my head a shake. She pointed out that we both have careers and she is going to want to have children in the future, which would keep us both busy.

What can I do here?

— Falling Out of Love, Birds Hill

Dear Falling: You and this woman are both shopping in the wrong place. Her love for you and children isn’t going to be enough for you and your love of animals. And, sadly, your growing menagerie would be cleared out if she had her way.

A good place for you to look for a mate is among animal-lovers. These are your people. Get to know them as friends first, whether connecting through animal-centric groups on social media or by involvement with shelters in your area.

If you end up marrying an animal-loving woman, you might make quite a duo with a country property and a delightful menagerie you share.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I recently was sexually-harassed by an important customer at my business. I work with clients who have a lot of money. Last week this big shot in his late 40s came in to discuss an investment project. Out of nowhere he looked me up and down and asked where I worked out to achieve such “amazing upper-body results.”

Then he cut to the chase and asked me to go for a drink after work “for further discussion of investment issues.” His eyes were roaming my body. I told him I was tired and it was probably time for him to go home to his family.

He didn’t budge and said to me nastily, “Oh, grow up.” That was it for me. I stood up and told him to leave. He did, but he stopped and talked to my older male boss. It may have been a cordial chat, but by the look on his face it wasn’t. I stayed home and fretted all weekend over this.

Should I ask for a talk with my boss or leave it alone and pray nothing comes down on me?

— Nervous Investment Gal, Downtown

Dear Nervous: Don’t suffer silently. Go to your boss and repeat the exact exchange you had with this slimeball. Your boss may have suspected it with this guy, but perhaps he has no idea.

From now on, think about keeping a voice-recorder app handy on your phone in case you have another run-in with this guy. Then your boss could actually hear this creep and hopefully start dealing with him.

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6.

Maureen Scurfield
Advice columnist

Maureen Scurfield writes the Miss Lonelyhearts advice column.

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