Call leering brother-in-law out with hubby in earshot

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This article was published 31/05/2023 (1225 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: My husband is a good guy, but his single brother is a creep! He’s always staring at my long legs and at the bodies of other women in the family. I have asked my husband to take him to task for his behaviour but he doesn’t want to rock the boat, as he only has one brother.

What should I say to this guy? I don’t want it to become a personal vendetta. It’d be so much better if my husband would do something! What is wrong with my man?

— Creep Problem, St. Vital

Dear Problem: Your husband may be afraid of losing a brother forever, but is so sure of your love that he’s not afraid of losing you, even if he doesn’t act.

Since you’re afraid of putting this brother-in-law down, make a comment when your husband isn’t far away. Make it a touch playful, calling him out loudly: “Husband of mine, your brother is staring at my legs again!” Then raise your eyebrows and say clearly to the culprit: “Are you staring? It feels like you are!” That may be all you need to do, and you may just have to say it once.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I got in trouble because of a woman at work. I was having an under-the-radar relationship with her. Without thinking one morning, some unreleased news she told me from her department came flying out of my big mouth at work. Nobody knew about our liaison, and they still don’t. I took full blame and wouldn’t reveal my source — but I had to pack up my desk.

Unfortunately, I had no money saved to support myself — spent it all on her. In desperation, I called my young uncle and confessed. He offered me work on his farm, a bedroom and three meals a day if I came out there right away.

Within two weeks, I was well into farm life, working hard physically and actually enjoying being so tired out. I was unable to think about her, and thought maybe I was free!

But when I got a day off I hightailed it back to the city, and went straight to her favourite lunch place — and there she was.

I decided it was fate. We met at her place at 5 p.m. for a session. At her place she told me more inside information nobody should be hearing! What? Does she have no brain? I was shocked and left her place feeling cold as ice and drove back to the farm.

The trouble is, I’m so lonely. I really need somebody for a relationship and the sex that goes with it, and there’s no one out here for me. I’m 22. Please help.

— Needing Company Fast, southern Manitoba

Dear Needing: Instead of wasting more time running into Winnipeg, you need to make friends in their 20s and 30s in the country, and joining a club would really help. Golf clubs are common in small towns and great places to make new friends. Start by taking lessons, so you’re fun to include in a group. Recreational teams of all kinds likely need players in your town or nearby, so join in if you have time.

Summer festivals also start happening in June, so look for them within a half-hour driving radius. Also, check community newspapers, websites or social media groups and list all the dates for festivals, live music, fairs and local markets.

Show your young uncle the list and he’ll probably chat about it to other people. It’d be good for your dating career in the country to get known as a fun guy, and always the man with a plan!

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6.

Maureen Scurfield
Advice columnist

Maureen Scurfield writes the Miss Lonelyhearts advice column.

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