First and last resort is some genuine contrition

Advertisement

Advertise with us

DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: I had a hot job at a lake resort for the summer, but after a month I got into trouble for fraternizing with female guests.

Read this article for free:


or

Already have an account? Log in here »

To continue reading, please subscribe:

Subscribe and receive a limited-edition Free Press branded hat or tote.

Digital Subscription

One year of digital access for only $205*

  • Enjoy unlimited reading on winnipegfreepress.com
  • Read the E-Edition, our digital replica newspaper
  • Access News Break, our award-winning app
  • Play interactive puzzles

*First annual payment billed as $205.00 + GST for one year. This annual subscription will automatically renew at $233.00 + GST every 52 weeks (10% off the regular annual price of $259.35). Offer available to new and qualified returning subscribers only. Cancel any time.

To continue reading, please subscribe:

Add Free Press access to your Brandon Sun subscription for only an additional

$1 for the first 4 weeks*

  • Enjoy unlimited reading on winnipegfreepress.com
  • Read the E-Edition, our digital replica newspaper
  • Access News Break, our award-winning app
  • Play interactive puzzles
Start now

*Your next Brandon Sun subscription payment will increase by $1.00 and you will be charged $17.95 plus GST for four weeks. After four weeks, your payment will increase to $24.95 plus GST every four weeks.

Opinion

Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 08/08/2024 (737 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: I had a hot job at a lake resort for the summer, but after a month I got into trouble for fraternizing with female guests.

I guess I got what I deserved. I was fired and sent home with no references. In fact, the owner said he would be glad to give me a bad reference if he ever heard I was looking for another job in the same business.

So I came back home to Winnipeg and now I’m sweating it out as a labourer. The resort season is still going in the fall, and I realize how much I want my old job back. It suits me to be a guide and boater — and most people like me. The women really do for sure, but I can put a lid on that.

So what can I do to try to get my job back? Should I apologize to the boss who fired me so he’ll stop bad-mouthing me to other resorts that might hire me? I think that’s what’s happening because I keep applying, and nobody even calls me back. Please help, ASAP.

— Learned My Lesson, Winnipeg

Dear Learned: Give the guy who fired you a phone call and apologize. Tell him in detail that you’ve learned your lesson and have grown up quickly because of it. If nothing else, that might stop him from giving you any more bad references. Plus, if he’s desperate for guides toward the end of this season, he might let you come back because his customers will be mostly groups of men by then and it will be safer for you.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I thought I had a friend for life — we were really close for many years. But now if I have a problem and need support all I get from her is, “I just can’t hear this kind of stuff today.” Or she’ll just hang up on me. It’s so rude and really hurts.

I’m left feeling like I don’t matter to her — and it’s not fair. She would always call me when she needed help or a shoulder to cry on. I would listen and give her my total support, even if she was at fault. Now she just goes out socializing with other people and comes home and bad-mouths them behind their backs, I’m sure.

She never invites me along anymore. I finally brought this up with her and her response was, “You’re not the same type of friend as they are.”

I got mad and asked why I was good enough to lay all her stresses on me but not good enough to go out and join her and her friends for lunch. She hung up and I haven’t heard from her in a month.

So why do I still miss this witch when she obviously didn’t care about me in the first place?

— Alone and Lonely, North Kildonan

Dear Alone: It’s too bad this “friend” didn’t hang up on you sooner.

You’ve gained back the free time you would have been wasting listening to her put other people down. The only reason you miss this “witch” is you haven’t replaced her yet. But that can happen quickly with some planning.

Start enjoying the types of people who enjoy giving as much as receiving. Check out the extensive list of opportunities at Volunteer Manitoba (volunteermanitoba.ca) and then do further research into a half-dozen areas that interest you, and give two or three options a try. You’ll be amazed at the way this opens up your life to new experiences, and a better quality of friends.

But be aware. If your ex-buddy can’t find a replacement for your free counselling, she may give you a “pity call” down the road, saying she’s now over the fight, and she’s giving you another chance. You don’t owe her a polite response.

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6.

Maureen Scurfield

Maureen Scurfield
Advice columnist

Maureen Scurfield writes the Miss Lonelyhearts advice column.

Our newsroom depends on a growing audience of readers to power our journalism. If you are not a paid reader, please consider becoming a subscriber.

Our newsroom depends on its audience of readers to power our journalism. Thank you for your support.

Report Error Submit a Tip

More Stories

TV loses a visionary showrunner

Brad Oswald 4 minute read Preview

TV loses a visionary showrunner

Brad Oswald 4 minute read Tuesday, Apr. 3, 2018

Despite the respectful, nostalgic nods that are occasionally afforded to television’s long-ago, black-and-white past, there is simply no disputing that we — the binge-watching, Netflix-and-chilling, various-device-viewing generation — are living in TV’s golden age.

Not only is more content being created now than ever before, but the best of what is available to viewers of conventional broadcast TV, cable networks and streaming services is being produced at a level of quality that continually pushes boundaries, raises standards and challenges viewers on an almost-weekly basis to reconsider what qualifies as great.

And it’s worth noting, in this week when television lost one of its most noteworthy and powerful creative forces, just how significant Steven Bochco was in the modern evolution of the medium.

Simply put, Bochco, who died Sunday at age 74 after a lengthy battle with leukemia, helped set the stage for the current wave of scripted-TV excellence, particularly in the drama-series realm. Whatever it is that you consider to be the small screen’s best, from Game of Thrones to Breaking Bad to House of Cards to This Is Us, the roots of its success can be found in Bochco’s primetime productions of the 1980s and ’90s.

Read
Tuesday, Apr. 3, 2018

Can we have a G20 without Russia? Chrystia Freeland sounds ready to give it a try

Edward Keenan - Washington Bureau Chief, Toronto Star 6 minute read Preview

Can we have a G20 without Russia? Chrystia Freeland sounds ready to give it a try

Edward Keenan - Washington Bureau Chief, Toronto Star 6 minute read Friday, Apr. 22, 2022

“It is the case that the G20 can’t function effectively with Russia at the table, and with Russia in the room. It’s an absurd situation,” said Deputy Prime Minister Chrystia Freeland.

Read
Friday, Apr. 22, 2022

Get holiday baking on a roll with snowballs

Eva Wasney 2 minute read Preview

Get holiday baking on a roll with snowballs

Eva Wasney 2 minute read Tuesday, Jun. 17, 2025

These delightful little orbs go by many names: Snowballs, Mexican Wedding Cakes, Pecan Puffs. Whatever you want to call them, these nutty, subtly sweet cookies are a family-friendly bake — with easy and potentially cathartic steps (crush your holiday angst while crushing pecans) for kids of all ages.

Would pair well with a tall glass of milk on Christmas Eve.

Today’s Homemade Holidays recipe comes from Free Press copy editor David Fuller and is an adaptation from an older edition of Joy of Cooking. This recipe makes about 30 small cookies.

Snowballs

Read
Tuesday, Jun. 17, 2025

Firefighter’s death fuels cancer fight

Zoe Pierce 5 minute read Preview

Firefighter’s death fuels cancer fight

Zoe Pierce 5 minute read 2:01 AM CDT

The United Fire Fighters of Winnipeg is mourning the loss of Winnipeg firefighter Darrel Maynard while continuing its work to raise awareness of occupational cancer and improve health protections for firefighters.

Maynard, a senior firefighter II and acting lieutenant with the Winnipeg Fire Paramedic Service, died Aug. 5 at age 41 after a three-year battle with occupational cancer.

He served Winnipeg for nearly two decades and leaves behind his wife Francine and sons Colin and Christian.

“Darrel was an incredible, incredible person, an incredible firefighter, and really, really special to all of us,” said Nick Kasper, president of UFFW.

Read
2:01 AM CDT

Family of slain lawyer offers forgiveness to killer

Dean Pritchard 5 minute read Preview

Family of slain lawyer offers forgiveness to killer

Dean Pritchard 5 minute read Thursday, Feb. 10, 2022

In voices sometimes choked with anguish, family members of a young city lawyer who died defending a friend from a senseless assault offered forgiveness to his killer Thursday.

“I release you from the unpayable debt you owe for my brother’s life,” Michael Silicz told 22-year-old Keishawn Mitchell at a sentencing hearing Thursday.

Justin Silicz, 32, died on June 2, 2019, after he was stabbed while walking to his car from an after-hours club with friends.

A jury convicted Mitchell of second-degree murder following a trial last November.

Read
Thursday, Feb. 10, 2022

Oleksiak makes history with seventh Olympic medal

The Canadian Press 7 minute read Preview

Oleksiak makes history with seventh Olympic medal

The Canadian Press 7 minute read Sunday, Aug. 1, 2021

TOKYO - The Canadian women finished their impressive medal haul in the pool – including a record-setting performance from Penny Oleksiak – and Andre De Grasse finally got Canada's men on the board with his second consecutive Olympic bronze in the men's 100 metres.

After finishing third in the medley relay, Maggie Mac Neil draped a bronze medal brimming with significance around Oleksiak's neck as their teammates Kylie Masse and Sydney Pickrem celebrated on the podium.

"Most decorated," they chanted in unison with their arms around each other during post-ceremony interviews with reporters.

On the final day of swimming competition at the Tokyo Olympics, Toronto's Oleksiak took her place at the top among Canada's greatest Olympians. In helping the medley relay team win bronze, she earned her seventh career Olympic medal, and at just 21 became the most decorated Canadian Olympian of all time.

Read
Sunday, Aug. 1, 2021