There are ways to evade a November nadir

Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 07/11/2025 (287 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: November feels like Nowhere Land to me. The snow and the cold are coming, and I tend to get into a bad, low mood in the weeks after Halloween — until we actually get big, white snowbanks.

I get so depressed I just stay inside and mope.

Can you please help me skip the November blues this year? I really hit a low last fall and I’m scared.

— Frownie Face, Westwood

Dear Frownie Face: Hibernating is not on order for you this year. You can avoid the blues with these hot tips.

Although it’s colder, you need to dress up warmly and get outside with friends.

So, dig out your winter clothes and mitts and boots, and book back-to-back walking dates with people who don’t want to get into the doldrums either, and are willing to go to battle.

Your fun weapons can be to play up-tempo music while you walk and bring cookies and snacks in your pockets to eat and share as you go. When you get cold, hit a café along the way for coffees, hot chocolate and fun conversation.

Do this with a couple of friends a week and you will feel extraordinarily fine for chilly November.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I’m pushing 40 and have been married twice already, and that’s enough. My new girlfriend wants to be a bride, as she’s only 27, and it would be her first marriage. I have no taste for these promises and rituals anymore. Last night she cried and said, “Why don’t I get to have a nice wedding?”

I no longer believe in making a pile of vows at a church that are too easily broken. I just believe in making a better pick each time.

This sweet young woman is the one I should have married long ago, and I would have still been with her. What do you think?

— Wedding Hassle, East Kildonan

Dear Hassle: Open your arms and your heart again. Ask this woman — the love of your life, you say — what she dreams about in a wedding with you, and help make it come true for her — and for you, too.

You say she’s the one you should have married in the first place, so stop looking behind you and start looking ahead at a beautiful future with this woman.

Give it everything you’ve got, plus the benefit of being able to avoid the blunders you made before.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: My younger sister is such an idiot. She went away for a month’s holiday to see her old university friends in Newfoundland, including an old boyfriend.

She has never gotten over him, and when she phoned me after two weeks away, she told me they were an item again, and it might be serious this time.

Hours later, her recent Winnipeg boyfriend found out from her that she’s seeing her ex again and he phoned to ask me to the bar for a serious talk. I have always found him attractive and he knows that.

Well, one thing led to another and we connected in a big way. I need damage control now. My sister’s coming back but we haven’t told her about us yet.

— Got the Guilts, St. Vital

Dear Guilts: Just hope your sister and the old college love in Newfoundland are back together in a permanent way and she’s happy to lose this Winnipeg boyfriend — even to you, big sister.

Depending on how hopped up she is over getting her Maritimer back, she might feel more relief than indignation and you’ll be off the hook without a problem. So, tell her while she’s away and let her digest it while she’s there — in her guy’s arms.

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6.

Maureen Scurfield
Advice columnist

Maureen Scurfield writes the Miss Lonelyhearts advice column.

   Read full biography