Successful season of separation demands trust

Advertisement

Advertise with us

DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: I’ve been seeing a beautiful, funny woman for eight months, but I must admit I’ve already been away a lot travelling for the sport I’m involved in. Naturally, she hasn’t mentioned to me she has a lineup of admiring guys wanting to date her whenever I’m away.

Read this article for free:


By clicking the button above, an account will be created and you will begin to receive some of our recommended newsletters. You may opt out of any newsletter by visiting your Email and Communication Preferences page or by clicking "unsubscribe" at the bottom of any email.

or

Already have an account? Log in here »

To continue reading, please subscribe:

Digital Subscription

One year of digital access for only $1.44 a week*

  • Enjoy unlimited reading on winnipegfreepress.com
  • Read the E-Edition, our digital replica newspaper
  • Access News Break, our award-winning app
  • Play interactive puzzles

*Billed as $5.77 plus GST every four weeks. After 52 weeks, price increases to the regular rate of $19.95 plus GST every four weeks. Offer available to new and qualified returning subscribers only. Cancel any time.

To continue reading, please subscribe:

Add Free Press access to your Brandon Sun subscription for only an additional

$1 for the first 4 weeks*

  • Enjoy unlimited reading on winnipegfreepress.com
  • Read the E-Edition, our digital replica newspaper
  • Access News Break, our award-winning app
  • Play interactive puzzles
Start now

*Your next Brandon Sun subscription payment will increase by $1.00 and you will be charged $17.95 plus GST for four weeks. After four weeks, your payment will increase to $24.95 plus GST every four weeks.

Opinion

Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 13/11/2024 (716 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: I’ve been seeing a beautiful, funny woman for eight months, but I must admit I’ve already been away a lot travelling for the sport I’m involved in. Naturally, she hasn’t mentioned to me she has a lineup of admiring guys wanting to date her whenever I’m away.

But last week I was home and my good friend insisted on taking me out drinking alone. He said, “Buddy, you need to know your girlfriend has a lot of guys for ‘best friends.’ I see them out drinking and dancing together at the clubs. She isn’t even hiding how much she likes it anymore!”

I left right away and drove straight to her place to tell her what he said. She said, “That’s a big lie. Your best friend is the worst one for trying to come on to me when you’re away. He only told you that to make you break up with me, because he’s in love with me himself!”

She was so mad she was pushing me backwards and kept poking at my chest, saying, “I’ve always been true to you and this is the thanks I get?”

She backed me right out the front door and off the porch. I was so relieved to hear her say she was being true to me, I had tears coming. But then she quickly locked her door and wouldn’t let me back in!

When I calmed down, I started thinking, “Who do I believe? How does a guy hold onto a girlfriend when he’s always away?” I’m so frustrated and so lonely for my girlfriend but what if she is seeing other guys?

— Distance Difficult, Winnipeg

Dear Distance: Here’s the best thing you can do during a busy sports season. Clearly express your trust for your loved one, shut your ears to the gossips and stay close with your sweetheart by phone and messaging while you’re miles apart.

Some strong couples can make it through a season doing this but many can’t. They just give up on the relationship until after the season and then see if there’s anything left between them. By then, they’re often so hurt, it’s just too late. So, get calling!

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I’m 17 and just found out I was “born on the wrong side of the blanket.”

I looked it up online. That means I was conceived out of wedlock and that makes me an extra baby, the product of cheating and maybe not wanted.

I kind of look like the rest of the family, even the dad I already know — except for my odd eye colour. Should I tell my mother what I heard about her cheating with a certain man and having me as a result — or should I keep it to myself?

Do you think my bio-father knows I’m his child? I found out his full name, and where he lives — not so far away. I don’t know what to do with this information, which makes me feel kind of sick. Please help.

— Mixed Up, rural Manitoba

Dear Mixed Up: Being a “father” has as much to do with dad-like behaviour as it does with sharing DNA with a mate to create a child. If you are treated with love by your mom’s present mate, it’d be wise to continue with things the way they are, at least for now.

Yes, it’ll be hard to tuck your insider knowledge away. You might talk with your mom and a school counsellor about it.

As far as contacting your bio-dad, you may want to wait until you’re a bit older, and then pay him a visit to talk adult-to-adult with him, if you possibly can.

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6.

Maureen Scurfield

Maureen Scurfield
Advice columnist

Maureen Scurfield writes the Miss Lonelyhearts advice column.

Our newsroom depends on a growing audience of readers to power our journalism. If you are not a paid reader, please consider becoming a subscriber.

Our newsroom depends on its audience of readers to power our journalism. Thank you for your support.

Report Error Submit a Tip

More Stories

Moving past the Indian Act will take time and trust

Niigaan Sinclair 5 minute read Preview

Moving past the Indian Act will take time and trust

Niigaan Sinclair 5 minute read 4:52 PM CDT

If I had a dime for every time a politician has called for the “abolishment”of the Indian Act, I’d be a rich man.

OK, maybe I’d have enough coins to jingle loudly in my pocket.

My point: a Canadian leader calling for the end of the race-based law passed in 1867 that is designed to give the federal government broad and brutal control over First Nations governments, membership, and reserve land is nothing new.

Premier Wab Kinew became the latest to advocate for this, during the First Nations-first ministers meeting in Ottawa this week.

Read
4:52 PM CDT

Election results: School trustees 2026

Staff 1 minute read Preview

Election results: School trustees 2026

Staff 1 minute read Friday, Oct. 23, 2026

Below you’ll find live 2026 election results for school trustees in Winnipeg divisions.

We can display results only for wards in which Winnipeg voters cast a ballot; we do not have access to live results reporting for school boards outside of Winnipeg.

 

Read
Friday, Oct. 23, 2026

Meteorologist behind Rob’s Obs is moving weather station to Ontario

Ben Waldman 7 minute read Preview

Meteorologist behind Rob’s Obs is moving weather station to Ontario

Ben Waldman 7 minute read Monday, Jun. 13, 2022

In a Winnipeg winter, there are always at least two certainties: it will be cold, and it will snow. A third certainty: the people will talk endlessly about how frigid the temperature is, and argue about how much snow is cloaking their driveways. Is it colder than it ever has been? Is there more snow today than the same time last year?

Rob Paola likely knows the answers to those questions.

Paola possesses no super powers. He is but a man with a metre stick and 40 years of professional meteorological experience, in the midst of a lifelong love affair with Mother Nature, a most turbulent mistress who rarely, if ever, reciprocates.

Each year when snow begins to fall, Paola heads outside his Charleswood home to figure out how much. He sticks his ruler in the ground, grabs his clipboard, and clicks his pen. In neat script, he records the temperature, what time precipitation began, how deep the powder is stacked. Then, he shares his data and insights online with thousands of followers who want a clear answer to the eternal questions: Why is this happening? When will it stop? How much snow has fallen in the city of Winnipeg?

Read
Monday, Jun. 13, 2022

‘All females are at risk’: serial sex offender released from prison

Erik Pindera 4 minute read Preview

‘All females are at risk’: serial sex offender released from prison

Erik Pindera 4 minute read 1:43 PM CDT

Law enforcement are warning the public that a dangerous sex offender with a lengthy history of abusing women is expected to live in Winnipeg after his release from prison.

Douglas Wayne Bowman, 62, left prison on Thursday after serving a lengthy sentence for two sexual assaults he committed at knifepoint, said the Manitoba Integrated High Risk Sex Offender Unit, a joint force of the Winnipeg Police Service and RCMP that keeps an eye on certain sex criminals.

Bowman was handed the 14-year sentence in 2018, less six years time served, and designated a dangerous offender. Criminals deemed dangerous offenders are given indefinite federal sentences until parole officials decide it is safe enough to release them.

Now that he’s leaving prison, Bowman will be subject to a 10-year long-term supervision order, which allows corrections and parole officials to continue to monitor him in the community even though his sentence is complete.

Read
1:43 PM CDT

World Indigenous Business Forum comes home to Winnipeg for first time, ponders questions for future prosperity

Aaron Epp 5 minute read Preview

World Indigenous Business Forum comes home to Winnipeg for first time, ponders questions for future prosperity

Aaron Epp 5 minute read Tuesday, Oct. 27, 2026

When Nicola Shirley-Phillips imagines what the Indigenous economy in her country might look like 100 years from now, she doesn’t mention social media or artificial intelligence. Instead, she envisions a holistic way of life where people work alongside each other in a way that cares for the planet.

“I see community (and) I see us being more respectful of all the energies around us — our water energy, our climate (and) the soil,” she said. “In all of that, there are opportunities for us to create businesses and opportunities to provide our services.”

Shirley-Phillips, a serial entrepreneur, organic farmer and community economic development specialist from Jamaica, shared her vision Tuesday morning during a panel discussion focused on Indigenous women and prosperity.

The discussion was one of the first items on the schedule during the first full day of the World Indigenous Business Forum at the RBC Convention Centre in Winnipeg.

Read
Tuesday, Oct. 27, 2026

Waiting for Cormier verdict the ‘calm before the storm’

Katie May 6 minute read Preview

Waiting for Cormier verdict the ‘calm before the storm’

Katie May 6 minute read Thursday, Feb. 22, 2018

As the jury room door closed behind the seven women and four men who are now deliberating on the evidence against Tina Fontaine’s accused killer, Thelma Favel rose from the chair she’s occupied for most of Raymond Cormier’s second-degree murder trial.

Almost every day over the past three weeks, Favel, the woman who raised 15-year-old Tina, has sat right up front, directly across from the jury box, listening, sobbing and soaking in disturbing details of the teen’s last days that have come to light over the course of Cormier’s second-degree murder trial.

On Wednesday afternoon, after Court of Queen’s Bench Chief Justice Glenn Joyal instructed the jury and sent them off to be sequestered until they decide whether 56-year-old Raymond Cormier is guilty of killing Tina, Favel got up and hugged Crown prosecutor Breta Passler. It was one of many moments, this one shielded from jurors, that have long since proven the emotional impact of the case and the lasting power of Tina’s legacy.

Tina’s death sparked a public outcry that renewed calls for a national inquiry into disproportionately high rates of missing and murdered Indigenous women and girls across Canada, and the criminal trial for the man accused of killing her hasn’t happened in a vacuum.

Read
Thursday, Feb. 22, 2018