Opposite types can thrive together, with work

Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 30/01/2026 (251 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: I broke the biggest 2026 resolution I made — never to sleep with my ex again — and it didn’t take long. By 12:15 a.m. on Jan. 1, I heard her truck and she was at my door. I am a weakling.

We live in a small town and I knew she would come, like she does every New Year’s Eve. I must confess, I wait for the sound of her truck’s motor.

I always know ahead of time that deep down I still love her and it will hurt for a while afterward. I do still love her, but in the daytime she natters non-stop and asks me too many questions and makes me nervous, and I run away emotionally again.

I’m a quiet man, and do a lot of thinking and researching for the material I write. When we dated steadily, she said my constant quietness was spooky and she couldn’t live with it.

Yet, there we were once again making love like we mean it on New Year’s Day.

I’ve tried dating women who are quiet and shy like me, but thought I would die of boredom before the first date was over.

Do you think there’s anything this woman and I could do this year to fix this, so we could get along — and maybe live together forever as a normal couple?

We know this much already — I will never be outgoing and she will never be shy. Are we hopeless?

— Shy Man in Love, southern Manitoba

Dear Shy Man: I met a similar couple to you two and they learned how to make it work really well. She was noisy and outgoing, he was quiet — but the difference was their airwaves were filled with pet noises and the sound of humans relating to the pets.

It was not exactly a quiet household, but every being in it seemed relaxed and happy amid the action.

Did you know that some shy and quiet people chat away enthusiastically with their pets when they’re alone with them because then the pressure is off. They don’t have to come up with well thought-out replies and make deep conversation.

Pets and music could help you fill the air with pleasant sounds between conversations, instead of quietness.

It would also help if you two both wrote down all the things that you admire about each other and what you miss most when you’re apart.

There’s really a lot good here, so why not go after it in 2026?

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: My new boyfriend wakes up in the night laughing. I don’t know what that’s about and he can’t explain it. Do you know what’s going on? It’s been happening for months now.

— Mystery Joke? Osborne Village

Dear Mystery Joke: This can be harmless, or it can sometimes be a symptom of a neurological disorder. It’s time for your guy to talk to his doctor about it to rule out that possibility. Get on his case and don’t let it slide. Let’s hope he’s just a naturally happy guy with hilarious dreams.

Please send your questions to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6.

Maureen Scurfield
Advice columnist

Maureen Scurfield writes the Miss Lonelyhearts advice column.

   Read full biography