Enlist landlord to turn down neighbours’ volume

Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 19/04/2022 (1614 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: My side-by-side duplex neighbour sings loud, horrible duets with his girlfriend. She sings in a screechy soprano, and he bangs on the piano, and attempts to “harmonize” with her.

It’s just painful. We can hear them clearly through our cheap walls. For some reason, they get inspired late at night. Then they can go for up to an hour “singing” together. It’s endless when you’re trying to go to sleep and have to work in the morning. We figure they must be hitting the bottle.

I end up having to bang on the wall and swear at the top of my lungs to shut them up. Last night the guy banged back, and yelled through the wall, “What’s your problem, you idiot? Why don’t you come over here!”

Should I go see them? My girlfriend wants me to shut down their singing for good, no matter what it takes.

— Never Been a Good Fighter, Fort Rouge

Dear Never a Fighter: You’re probably past the point of a visit and a reasonable discussion. The owner of the duplex has to step in on your behalf now and enforce the noise rules — if there are any.

What your neighbours need is an exact time at night when they must cease and desist the “singing” or they’ll have to find somewhere else to live.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I’m not much for big homemade meals or “eating-off-the-floor” cleaning standards. I can order a delicious meal, and my husband and I chip in to have our home deep-cleaned, seasonally.

I’m so sick of my showboat friend, who often drops in unannounced and criticizes my mess. She’s a real fancier-than-thou “boss’s wife” type. That’s fine in her own palatial home, but when preaching at me? Enough already!

I work seven busy hours a day from my home office, and I must be there for online meetings and out-of-province sales work. She drops in anyway, and always gives me “the look.”

She said yesterday, “You don’t work full time. Why not take a cooking course, clean up yourself and save all that money?” Really? I enjoy filling my life with work I love and fun things my husband and I enjoy — not cooking and cleaning.

I do have to say she’s been by my side when I really needed her, and I wouldn’t want to lose our friendship. How do I tell her to mind her own business when it comes to my messy house?

— Super Annoyed, Bridgwater

Dear Annoyed: Next time you see “the look” on her face, ask Bossy Boots how many hours of housework she does per day. Then mention you do seven full, intense hours of office work, and say, “So our contest is over, don’t you agree?”

She may try to brush you off, but be willing to argue the situation, comparing responsibilities and expenditures. She may not be persuaded to your side, but she will finally learn to button her lip on this issue.

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6.