What has your impact been?

Wolseley

Like many others at the start of a new year, I am moved to think about what matters most to me as the calendar page is turned onto a new beginning.

I’ve always been very much aware of death, not in any kind of morbid way, but as a parallel to an awareness of life. It’s all one big circle, after all. And it helps when we understand and accept that all of us are here only for a while so why not make the most and the best of it.

I try not to take anyone or anything for granted. Including breath. Maybe it’s because I’ve attended so many funerals, and given too many eulogies to count anymore. My sister, my father, my mother, my brother-in-law, colleagues, and friends — so many friends.

Each time it was a privilege to be the designated speaker to reflect and share about that person’s life, and each time it felt like a little piece of my soul was torn apart. Like the hole in my heart I always imagined existed kept getting bigger. But somehow the heart kept functioning.

In 2021, I started writing life stories for the Passages section of the Free Press, in which people are remembered for their contributions — big and small — in our communities. I remember the many family members I’ve had the honour of interviewing to learn about their loved one who has left this world.

And I recognize a common theme. Whether they’re high-profile or regular folk, religious or non-religious, wealthy or poor, award-winning or not, from one country or culture or another, they all have one thing in common.

Impact. They had a powerful and positive impact in this world, in this province, in this city, in their communities and families, in one way or another. Thinking about these interviews, re-reading notes and quotes, enriches my own life immensely.

Family members often talk about their loved ones being kind, compassionate, thoughtful, and loving. Nobody ever talks about material possessions, how big or fancy their house was or the number of cars they had or the multiple bank accounts and what was in them. Nobody.

But everyone, old and young, consistently mentions memories about the time they spent together at the cottage or around the kitchen table, sharing meals, stories and laughter. Dancing in the kitchen. Feeding the birds. Painting a painting. Finding purpose and meaning in the little things.

If each one of us took a few minutes every day to ask ourselves what kind of impact we are having in our own circles, imagine the room for growth and beauty. If we had to write our own obituary, our own eulogy, our own life story for the Passages section, what would that content include?

I have been using this approach as a method to encourage kindness in moments where all I want to do is scream in frustration about the state of the world or have a pity party because I’m having a bad day.

I like to think that daily practise is helping me become a better person. A person of integrity, empathy, generosity and compassion. Traits I admire most in others and aspire to in myself.

I think about all the remarkable people right here in our own city who have raised children in loving homes, helped their neighbours out when nobody else could or would, volunteered with community groups, tirelessly advocated for causes they believed in, brought music and art to the world — and wisdom and life lessons. They’re often called role models. Or heroes. Or even stars. And that’s what they are. Because these are the people whose legacy will continue to shine bright in others through family, friends and community. That kind of impact spreads around even after they’re long gone. And our world needs that more than ever, it seems.

Impact can be felt at every level: from a marriage to a family to a community and beyond. In an ideal world, that impact would lead to a legacy rich in hope for a better and more caring world.

So, as we welcome 2026, I am eternally grateful to all who remind me that we have it in us to create the kind of impact we’d like celebrated and remembered not only while we are here but after we are gone. Here’s to an amazing new year.